“Young Master this isn’t like you to make such rash decisions like going after the Poison Demonic Sect hideouts. The Young Master I know would have developed a plan to deal with the situation, not this suicide method.”
Li Shen shook his head and said.
“I’m perfectly myself, and there’s nothing for you to worry about, I’m handling the situation like any other time.”
“Really?’
Lihua suddenly rebutted.
“Because if having a Nascent Soul cultivator from the Poison Demonic Sect attacking you is you handling the situation like usual, then you’d be dead countless times over the years.”
Li Wen hearing Lihua’s words had his stoic expression fall, and he hurriedly came to Li Shen’s side to examine him.
Fanning him away, Li Shen said.
“I’m fine, what are you panicking for?”
Turning to Lihua, he asked.
“Were you having your sub-division members keep track of me? I went alone, so I had expected you not to-”
“Young Master!”
Li Shen was suddenly cut off by Li Wen.
Surprised by the sudden shout, Li Shen turned back to look at Li Wen to see him with a worried expression on his face.
“Lady Ying tasked me to watch over you and step in if you were in danger, but she also said to do so if you're making a decision that put yourself in harm's way. Right now, that’s exactly what you're doing. Why are you pushing us away and insisting on going about this alone?”
Li Shen was stumped for a moment before he opened his mouth to say something, but he find that he couldn’t give a response.
The one he had at the back of his mind remained there and what came out was…
“The answer is simple, you're all too weak currently to help me. I need you all to become stronger, and only then-”
“What? Only then can we help you? Does that make sense?”
Lihua interjected.
Suddenly, her tone of respect dropped and she approached Li Shen and pointed at his face.
“You know what your problem is? It’s that you're looking down on us and seeing us as burdens.”
“What? No I’m not, I would never see you guys that way.”
Li Shen was offended by Lihua’s words and he frowned at her.
“Really? Then why are you speaking as if you aren’t in the same boat as us? Weak but striving to grow stronger together. If you were so powerful that we needed to grow stronger for us to help you, why are you here, in this abandoned house nursing your wounds?”
Li Shen had never seen Lihua like this, and it seemed like a parent scolding their child. But her words hit something in Li Shen’s heart.
“You aren’t much stronger than us, but you gave that speech earlier in the academy. And you even went ahead and did the same thing Jun did after warning us not to. Doesn’t that make you a hypocrite?”
Like a final nail in the coffin, Lihua's words struck a cord in Li Shen’s heart dead on.
“I-”
He went to say something, but he look at Lihua before he turn to Li Wen to see the same look in their hearts.
It was a emotion of worry.
And not just a worrying emotion one would have when their favorite snack ran out at the story, but one that was genuinely filled with concern that someone close to you was about to die.
Li Shen’s heart quivered because he knew that feeling, it was the one he felt when he saw Jun wrapped in bandages.
He could no longer stand looking at it and knowing he was the cause so he lowered his head.
His shoulders slacked and he reflected on his actions tonight. And it was true, this wasn’t like him. He would have never made the decision that put himself in such a situation.
His identity had even just been revealed, something he had worked so hard to keep a secret. But seeing Jun like that had caused him to throw all of the lessons he learn out the window.
He had become a kid throwing a tantrum.
Li Shen felt ashamed of himself, this was no different from his past rash behavior.
It’s as if he learned nothing.
“I just...don’t want to see anyone I consider family gets hurt.”
Li Shen said after a moment as he raised his head.
Lihua and Li Wen saw the dread and terror of losing them in his eyes that he always kept hidden.
Like Li Shen had said, his resolve in this life was to protect his family. Something he couldn’t have done in his previous lives.
Not only in his last life as Avarice, but Li Shen came to know that during his death at age fourteen in the memories of his other lives, not only him, but his entire family had died. And he watched it, every single time.
It was like some predestined fate that he was condemned to. To be reincarnated and go through the suffering torture of seeing his family die over and over again.
Li Shen had buried that aspect of the memories, but now he realized that it was still haunting him, dictating his behavior on a subconscious level.
No, he always knew it was, but he was ignoring it.
“You’re right Lihua, I’m a hypocrite. I’m selfish to say that you’re weak to help me but push you all away when you try to do just that. I’m too afraid of seeing any of you get hurt. And I’m a coward in every sense of the word.”
Li Shen's head was still raised as he spoke, and hearing his words, Lihua had to lower the finger she was pointing at him.
The anger she felt upon coming here had reached a cliff having nowhere to go, no one to direct towards.
Seeing Li Shen so vulnerable like this, she had the urge to hug him. But this sad and pitiful Li Shen annoyed her so much that she slapped him over the head instead.
Whack!
“Ow! What the… The hell you suddenly slap me for?! I know I deserved it but you could have at least been a bit more gentle, I’m injured for heaven's sake.”
Lihua shook her limp and aching hand while saying.
“This unusual behavior is too different from your shameless appearance. Just stop feeling sorry for yourself and instead be better. Stop treating us like fragile rocks that need protection from the rain. We make mistakes but so do you, and so does everyone. There’s no need to write us off as people that won’t be able to help in situations like this.”
Lihua paused for a moment then said.
“Just rely on us more. The more you do, the stronger we’ll become to help you in the future.”
Li Wen who was off to the side nodded his head.
He was glad Lihua was here to say this to Li Shen as he wouldn’t be able to.
He would have died of embarrassment.
Li Shen smiled and said.
“Thanks Lihua, I promise I’ll be a better Faction Leader and friend.”
“Don't say it, just do it.”
“Okay.”
Lihua nodded and then turned to look out the window.
She then asked.
“I’m guessing this is the next city you were going to target?”
Li Shen smiled bitter and replied.
“Yeah, that Huifen guy gave me the location of some hideouts that Poison Progenitor was supposedly spotted. But I think he just gave me some random locations of the Poison Demonic Sect hideouts.”
Li Shen blamed himself for causing this mess, but he also blamed Huifen a bit because he had given him the hideout that had a Nascent Soul cultivator waiting in ambush.
As Li Shen was plotting his revenge for when he met Huifen again, he saw that Lihua’s expression turned serious and she was taking out a jade slip to hurriedly check something.
“Lihua what is it?”
Li Shen asked.
“This city, I knew I recognized the location when we were coming here.”
After saying that, Lihua look up from the jade slip in her hand to Li Shen and continued.
“This city, it’s a central point of Demonic Cult activity in the surrounding area. The same layout as the town before.”
Li Shen’s eyes narrowed at that.
“Are you saying the Demonic Cult hideout here might have the Poison Progenitor?”
Lihua shook her head before responding.
“I’m not saying he’s definitely here, but this form of structure was similar to the town’s own. Either it’s him, or the people who might have framed our member’s crucifixion as his doing.”
Li Shen’s eyes become cold.
“Either way, this hideout is the one we’re looking for.”
**
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